i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
