I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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