K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
