I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize