i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
