i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
