no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
