She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
