these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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