Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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