Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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