Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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