FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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