I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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