i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
