That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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