Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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