Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
