did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
