Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
