Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Soap is not a condiment
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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