Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
