my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
