eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I smell like Dick and happiness
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
