please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
You smell like stripper and shame
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
