We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize