I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
