why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
where am i from again
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
