I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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