it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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