your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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