He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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