My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
