May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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