Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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