she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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