Where did you get a picture of my penis
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
