Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
