So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize