Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Couch. On fire.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
