Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
