I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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