His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
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