Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize