I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
