In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
