at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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