dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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