I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
