he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
