sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
